So, there’s this cute person you met in class. You spend all class laughing with them, talking about the material, and staring at them. Seeing them once or twice a week for a few hours at a time just doesn’t feel like enough, so you want to try to see them outside of class.
You have an upcoming test and ask them if they want to study together. They say yes, you make your plans, and poof... you now have a study date!
First off, what is a study date?
A study date usually means a date that someone has planned in which you study. This can be a good step in-between a casual hang out and an actual date. It’s also less stressful because you don’t have to plan anything too extreme, since the overall goal is to study (and get to know your potential bae).
But how do you plan for a study date?
First, pick a location in which you can actually study. It might not be the best idea to ask your date to go to a concert when you’re planning on studying. However, it can be somewhere on campus, like your dorm room or the library, or it can be somewhere like a park or a café. Try to find somewhere where you can talk without disturbing others but can also focus.
I know half of the reason you’re inviting them to study is because you want to get to know this person better. Factor in some time to study and some time to get to know each other.
If you decide to study at a diner, then you can study while you wait for your food to come, but once you start eating, you can talk about things other than class. Or, once you’re done studying suggest getting a pick-me-up, like coffee or dessert. The whole point of a study date is to keep it casual, so try to do something where you can be fun and serious.
What do I wear?
Wear whatever you feel best in! Stick with something casual, as you will likely be spending a lot of time sitting down and studying. It’s not a real date, so spending time researching the location and searching endless Pinterest images is not necessary.
If this means leggings and a t-shirt for you, then that’s perfect; or, it may mean a cute top and skirt. As long as it’s something you feel comfortable in, then you can wear whatever you want.
Okay, but what about when we actually hang out?
Look for signs that this person is interested. Are they only talking to you about the course material and staring directly at the paper? Or are they taking breaks to laugh and share stories and trying to sit as close to you as they can? Do they seem like they want to hang out after you’re done studying or do they seem only interested in spending time with you to study?
If the person seems like they are also interested in you outside of class, then they will show it. However, if they seem like they only want to study, don’t force them to actually act on the date part of study date.
No matter what you’re studying, don’t play dumb. We’ve seen this trope in movies, such as Mean Girls, but just because you’re studying together doesn’t mean that you have to act like you don’t know the material. Hopefully your study partner will like that you’re smart, and if they don’t, then that’s not the person you want to be hanging out with anyway. Be the true version of yourself and your date will appreciate your honesty more than anything else.
Dates of any kind can be super-stressful, but try not to put too much pressure on the date. Best case scenario, you study and find out that you’re super-compatible. Worst case, you made a new friend and learned the notes for class.
A study date is supposed to be casual, and it’s up to you and the other person whether or not you want it to mean anything else. Try to live in the moment rather than focusing about whether you’re talking too much or whether or not they’re staring at you because they’re confused or interested.
The date is ending, now what do I do?
Ask them to hang out again! You can either suggest studying for the next test you have together if you want to keep it casual, or suggest going to get coffee or dinner. Try to think about what you talked about while taking a break from studying. Did they mention that they wanted to try that new restaurant around the corner? Did you talk about your shared interest in movies? Keep this in mind when asking them to get together in the future.
Try to keep it casual and make it sound natural. Remember, the worst thing they can say is no, and if that’s the case, then it wasn’t meant to be.