Breakups. They're never easy but we all go through them. But how do we do so in the healthiest possible way? Sometimes our first reaction is to get angry or maybe get into a deep depressive state. However, there are ways to use a breakup to your advantage and manage it well. Just follow the these simple steps to deal with your breakup in a healthy manner.
1. Contact Purge
The first thing you should do after a breakup is to purge your ex from all of your social media and from your phone. A breakup means a new beginning and you don't want to start a new chapter in your life constantly looking back. Since we're all on social media so frequently, it's too hard to ignore posts from your ex. I also suggest deleting your pictures with an ex from social media (or at least archiving them) and maybe leaving them in a little flash drive for when you're ready to look back.
Take your time before you look through the photos again or unmute your ex's Instagram story. When a breakup is fresh, it's better to give yourself more space than you think you need and to take extra time to be sure you're OK.
2. Use Your Support System
When in a time of crisis it's always important to lean on your friends. While it's great to talk to friends and vent out your emotions, take them up on their offers to help you as well. Let your friends take you out to lunches or coffee to take your mind off of the breakup.
While it's great to reflect on a relationship, it's also important to move forward. So have your friends as a shoulder to cry on but also allow them to help put a smile back on your face.
3. Don't Make Rash Decisions
Many times our initial reactions to a breakup aren't our best. When a breakup is fresh, your mind (understandably) wants you to move your focus elsewhere. This can lead to bad decisions like going out and drinking excessively, hooking up with strangers, or putting yourself into dangerous situations.
Instead of going with your knee-jerk reaction to go wild, invite some friends over and watch a few movies. Take it easy for a few days before you hit the town. While going out may take your mind off of things for a little while, putting yourself into dangerous situations can lead to major regrets. It's better to be safe than sorry.
4. Control Your Mourning
When going through a breakup, it's okay to express your emotions. But be sure to express your emotions in a productive manner. It's one thing to cry for a couple of days to let yourself feel but it's another thing to completely power down for months.
What I suggest is after the breakup, take two days out of your week to let yourself sit down and feel all of your emotions. And it's okay to cry! Crying can be beneficial and is your body's way of helping you express your emotions and get them out. If you let yourself stew in your emotions for weeks, your life could be majorly affected in a negative way. So let it all out and then move on.
5. Focus on the Future
Now that you've let your emotions out, it's time to move on. Sure, you may want to sit and listen to sad music and cry it out over Ben and Jerry's for a month, but you'd be wasting your time. Instead, move the focus towards bettering yourself and getting things done.
Do you want to give yourself a style makeover? Do it. Do you want to start a blog? Do it. This is your time to make changes in your life and move towards the future. And eventually, you will let yourself back into the dating world. But there's nothing wrong with spending a little time on yourself first. In fact, it will better prepare you for future relationships.
How do you handle a breakup in a productive manner?
Breakups can be nasty, heartbreaking and depressing. But with these five tips, you'll be able to go through the stages of mourning without getting stuck in a rut. And once you're through the emotional stages you have the whole world to look forward to -- so get out there and seize the day.