I have to be honest here, when I decided to write about this topic I was in a better mood.
I was enjoying a fun night out: my hair was the perfect ratio of messy to sleek, my makeup was on fleek, and my all-black outfit was giving me Beyonce-level confidence. Safe to say I was absolutely feelin’ myself.
Revisiting this idea the next morning, I couldn’t help but think about what a hypocrite I sounded like. Physically I looked sightly less fleek-y than the night before (okay… A LOT less fleek-y) but mentally I could not have been farther from last night’s confident girl. These feelings come and go for me at an all too rapid pace.
As I sit here now, I realize how important this topic is to talk about because I am not alone in my self-love struggle. So many beautiful girls feel less than what they are because of what their insides are telling them.
The truth is: loving yourself is a roller coaster ride — some days you’re up, others you’re down. You just have to keep going.
Combatting feelings of self doubt is no east feat because, if you are anything like me, the bad days come on without much warning. As someone who struggles with these feelings, giving myself a reality check when my body and mind are at an impasse has become a daily routine.
While some instances are much harder to overcome than others, I have found that these mental exercises have been a huge help:
Let it Out
In your lowest moments scream, cry, or throw things. Do whatever you need to do to get the emotions you have out.
There are many reasons why people find it so hard to love themselves. However, it’s incredibly easy to feel inadequate when comparing yourself to others. What we don’t always realize is that those women you are comparing yourself to, they are comparing themselves to others as well.
When you’re playing the comparison game, you can’t win. Someone will always be prettier, smarter, more accomplished, or more together than you are. So STOP. You are letting your mind play this trick on you!
Instead of scrolling through Instagram and being jealous of the perfect-seeming lives you see there, take a deep breath, shut your eyes, and create a mantra to remind yourself of who you are. Or, you can steal mine: you are everything you need to be, you are perfectly made.
Be Kind to Yourself
In a low moment, take a long, hard look at yourself in a long mirror. Yes, this may feel uncomfortable at first. Do it anyway.
See your beautiful mind with a fresh set of eyes, celebrate the little stretch marks that dot your upper thighs, and compliment all the things that make you who you are: maybe it’s your mind, maybe it’s your strong legs. DO NOT leave the mirror until you have given yourself the kind compliments you deserve. No insults allowed here!
The kindness we give to ourselves will reflect as the kindness we accept from others. Be kind to yourself, be kind to others, let that kindness come back to you and fill your insides with happiness.
Be the Sun
Sometimes, pushing past a low moment requires you to purposefully trade a dark situation for a sunnier one.
If you’re feeling really down, don’t wallow. Throw on some lipstick and your Sasha-fiercest outfit, even if you don’t feel like it. Go out into the world! Laugh a little too hard, dance a little bit too wild, and feel free from your emotions. Do what makes you happy and put yourself first.
Don’t let low emotions eclipse how brightly you shine.
Loving yourself will always be hard, it will be a roller coaster ride of ups and downs. But I promise, making the effort to love yourself is worth it.
Have you ever felt in a self-love slump? What makes you feel better about yourself? I want to hear from you in the comments below!